we tend to be more
protective..
This is what i have become and what i have observed so far..
However, protective doesnt mean you ne
ed to be fake infront of your friends..
i understand you need to be fake in order to be able to blend into a bunch of friends.
But when you are not genuine..
there will be times that your mask will "drop" accidentally..
Please do not pretend to be noble, high cl
ass and appropriate as if you are one.
Please be yourself.
Find back the group of friends that suits you..
If not in the end
you will find that you will be trapped in t
heir shadow..
pressure by their behavior..
lost yourself in it..
I care for the person I'm indicating too but I cant speak to..
because my words and influence are not
as powerful as the power of "being own" in a group.
Nobody wants to be alone in the society..
Only the powerful mind, strong hearted, determined principle people can do that and i'm not the one of them..
Sometimes i wonder should i just scream at the p
eople who is faking around or i just close an eye and forget what is happening..
Someone told me: Just don't care what is happening and continue to act as if you are enjoying the company..
So this is what true friends is all about?
Acting?
instead of telling off the person you care?
Or because you realized that everyone is a gold mine to you?
and someday you will need them financially?
What if I have nothing left? Will you treat me that way as you did?
upset as I am..
I am still grateful that apart of all this
I have another bunch of friends who is sincere..
Doesn't care anything about you past or future..
and just enjoying the time being together..
Maybe that is why we do not involve each other in beneficiary issues..
We do not think that we are the best friends but we treat each other sincerely without a thought of taking anyone for granted..
you may think that i'm very shallow talking about this issue..
whilst this is normally happening when we were teenagers with all the peer issue..
however, Maybe because i do not how to treat people in a diplomatic way..
Don't the people felt it if you are just faking your smile? i can feel it though..
Don't the people felt it when you talk nonsense just to entertain them and get to know them? i felt it though..
It is scary how diplomatic one can be as young as me age.. Bribing actually happened already among us..
Maybe I'm too naive? or maybe i'm not up to your standard?
One told me: you should sacrifice in order to keep you friends around you..
Please justify to me about this..
Until now i still cannot accept this statement..
Tell me you think that this is right..
Or am i too stupid to understand..
Ya I'm too stupid and blunt to actually differentiate whether the tears are flowing from the heart or from the brain..
Yet this is again another cruel facts for the weak soul like me..
As pathetic as it is..
I know when the time is not right..
I will walk away..
That is when you know..
My heart has given up..
And i assured you..
I will never fake my tears and smile to the one i care..
